Step

Even though I take the dogs out for long walks to the jebels nearly every day, I felt that I wasn't getting the cardio exercise that I needed. I've not been making it to the gym as often as I would like. Perhaps I could use some peer pressure or somebody telling me what to do? So last week I went to a step class.

I've never been to a step class before, never been to any sort of organized exercise class before, but I had a good idea of what was involved. It seemed like it might be what I was looking for.

There's just one little problem: I have the grace of a turtle on its back. I've been this way all my life. Step class? What the hell was I thinking?

The instructor would call out "basic right, basic right" and you could put money down that I'd be stepping left instead.

I noticed that everyone would put their arms down when their knees went up. I tried to do this and could sometimes manage to do it once or twice, never multiple times in a row. I gave up and just flapped my arms around the way they seemed to be able to go. Yes, flapping.

There was a step called "the superman" where you step up onto one end of the step on one foot, extend your arms and push up onto your toes with that foot while extending your other leg behind you--something like a suspended leap. Surrounded by all of these tiny Asian and Arab women, I felt like a lump and knew I looked totally ridiculous.

For a few minutes I started to get frustrated. I can do all of these complex choreographies on an agility field or in a flyball lineup with my dog but I can't figure this out? Then I realized that it doesn't matter. That wasn't the point of my being there at all. I didn't know anybody there and it doesn't matter what I look like, that I'm stepping with the wrong foot. Nobody was keeping score. It wasn't a competition. There was no test afterwards. I realized that as long as I kept moving, I could catch up most of the time for a few counts.

In the end, I sweated my ass off for an hour. It was an hour of flailing limbs to be sure. At least I never tripped over anything. I could hardly walk from the building to the car afterwards. It felt great!